Finding that joie de vivre
It’s been said that we tend to pursue happiness but overlook joy. When was the last time you experienced a moment of joy? One that leaves you feeling completely free and uplifted. Sometimes we don’t register these moments when they happen because we lose touch with that feeling in the pursuit of happiness; yet this very pursuit is what makes us less happy. Joy can be found everywhere and while those moments may be fleeting, you can tune into them all around you.
Joy vs happiness
The words joy and happiness are often used interchangeably but they’re not actually the same thing. Happiness is more about how good we feel over time, whereas joy relates to how good we feel in the moment. Think about the universal joy that flowers bring or when spring is around the corner and you can feel it in the air. There’s a spring in your step and a smile beaming on your face. What about the last time you laughed so hard your face hurt. We are all capable of feeling joy and these momentary bursts of positive emotion .
As we get older and challenge our way through modern stress, we end up losing sight of the things that bring us joy. Aligning to social pressure, we start to become more serious, don’t play as much and prioritise work over personal time. Adults who continue doing the things that bring them joy are often mistaken as being childish and not taken seriously. The saying “act your age” comes to mind, but what does that really mean?
We as adults are holding ourselves back from joy. Children naturally find joy in the world around them: a cardboard box opposed to the toy that was inside, playing in the mud or jumping up and down. Remember the things that bring you joy and lean into them. Joy is something that you can harness everyday and creating more moments of joy in our life can make us happier over time.
Joy is in the air
You can spot joy everywhere you go. Take a walk down the street or through a forest and start to notice the things that make you feel something inside. A sense of vibrancy from a vintage car, a bright building or a pop of colour in nature. Enthusiasm from dressing up, playing a game or singing. Those are the things that can bring you joy. Author Ingrid Fetell Lee states that joy can be found through physical attributes such as bright colours and has recognised 10 aesthetics of joy: energy, abundance, freedom, harmony, play, surprise, transcendence, magic, celebration and renewal.
Being aware of how we can tap into moments of joy can increase their frequency and sustain their impact on us. As we exhibit joy, we connect with other people and feel more connected to the world around us. When someone smiles at you on the street, you automatically smile back. This in itself can create a joyful feeling inside and boost your mood. Next time you go for a walk or a run, smile at someone and feel the impact it has on you. It might even make your day.
Rediscovering the magic
Once you’ve identified some things that bring you joy, think about how you can intentionally build more of those moments into your life. Reverse your exercise, meditation or journaling routine into something that gives you joy instead of feeling like a chore. Think back to when you were a child and the movements that gave you feelings of positive emotion. Bring those back into your life again. It could be through dancing, running, swimming, art or being outdoors. How can you do those more often?
Letting yourself be joyful more frequently is easier said than done. There’s judgement attached to joy when you’re an adult and you can feel embarrassed and deny yourself the experience. We tend to forget that joy is another emotion with physical feelings, just like fear and anxiety. We all know what they feel like in our body: tightness, difficult breathing and sweaty hands etc. So what does joy feel like? Allowing yourself to feel joy from something and not dismissing it as childish can open up a new source of joy into your daily life. Your body will learn to loosen up, you’ll move more freely and start to take up space. Now is the time to find your joie de vivre.